What I do know is that having PTSD brain is an enigma. It warps time and is erosive.

There are days and even moments that escape me; making me question my ability to be consistent…to be reliable…to live in my integrity. 

…

Enter the paradox of imposter syndrome

Knowing full well that I have what it takes to do what I know God has called me to do next, yet a wave tries to overtake the knowing and knocks me over with a smudge of “you can’t do this”.

That’s imposter syndrome for you.

Sometimes the confidence – to share the message, to live without fear (even for a moment) –  comes to me in the middle of the night when everyone else is sleeping yet I am not. And it’s okay. 

One thing I’ve learned (& still learning) to do is to give myself permission to feel what I’m feeling, to acknowledge the feelings so I can live into my intention unhindered. 

The little me, the one I’ve been living in for so long, has done her job. 

I am safe! Thank you for keeping me safe. 

~~~

Enter truth

The world is different now, staying small is not an option. 

You have a voice and it’s a beautiful one! Let’s share it. 

You have what it takes! You’ve got this! You are not an imposter, many people don’t know who you are and it’s okay. 

Yes, that’s okay too. 

You’ve been living in trauma for so long and have had soooo many traumatic experiences to give you a voice of hope for someone else. 

So when you feel a message in your heart and are feeling the need to express it…do just that! 

Every now and again, it (the message) may feel non-sensical or disconnected when it’s put into written form…it’s okay! Keep it going, don’t let self-doubt creep in. Your message is valid. Your people will get you. Just remember not everyone is going to understand you but your people will!

You got this! Keep going!

…

Note to self (yes, I’m talking to you), if this resonates with you, let’s connect!